What
Is
the
Importance
of
the
Groom,
that
His
Iniquities
Are
Forgiven?
Article
7,
1988
Our
sages
said,
“Three
are
forgiven
their
iniquities:
A
gentile
who
converted,
one
who
becomes
great,
and
one
who
marries
a
woman.
From
this
we
learn
that
this
is
why
she
is
called
Mahalat,
since
his
iniquities
Nimhalu
[have
been
forgiven].
Conversely,
in
the
portion
VaYishlach,
she
is
called
Bosmat,
daughter
of
Ishmael”
(presented
in
RASHI,
VaYishlach).
This
verse
requires
explanation.
Our
sages
tell
us
that
forgiving
the
iniquities
of
the
groom
on
his
wedding
day
comes
from
Esau,
who
took
the
daughter
of
Ishmael,
whose
name
was
Bosmat,
daughter
of
Ishmael.
Since
it
is
written
in
the
portion
Toldot,
“Esau
went
to
Ishmael,
and
took
Mahalat
the
daughter
of
Ishmael,”
it
is
an
evidence
that
on
his
wedding
day,
the
groom
is
forgiven
his
iniquities.
It
follows
that
we
learn
this
entire
basis
from
wicked
Esau,
who
took
the
daughter
of
wicked
Ishmael.
This
is
difficult
to
understand.
After
all,
what
is
a
wicked
one?
It
is
one
who
says
that
there
are
no
sins
in
the
world
and
he
can
do
what
his
heart
desires
because
a
wicked
one
believes
in
nothing.
Thus,
the
wicked
one
says
that
he
never
sins.
Therefore,
why
does
he
need
his
iniquities
forgiven?
Is
a
person
given
that
which
he
does
not
want?
After
all,
there
is
no
light
without
a
Kli
[vessel],
no
filling
without
a
lack.
It
is
even
more
difficult
to
understand
what
is
the
real
reason
that
he
deserves
absolution.
What
is
his
privilege?
Is
it
because
he
took
a
wife
that
he
deserves
his
iniquities
forgiven?
It
makes
sense
that
one
who
does
a
great
deed,
which
we
cannot
appreciate
the
importance
of
the
matter,
then
we
understand
that
he
deserves
a
great
reward
for
this,
to
the
point
of
absolving
his
iniquities.
But
what
great
thing
did
he
do
by
taking
a
wife?
Also,
we
see
that
saying
a
litany
is
a
great
thing.
There
is
the
matter
of
thirteen
qualities
there,
as
well
as
kneeling.
But
if
there
is
a
groom
in
the
synagogue,
we
do
not
say
the
litany.
We
should
understand
the
importance
of
taking
a
wife,
that
all
seven
days
of
the
“seven
blessings,”
it
has
the
power
to
cancel
a
prayer,
which
is
so
important,
because
he
took
a
woman,
who
is
now
called
“a
bride.”
There
are
many
explanations
in
the
literal,
but
we
should
interpret
this
in
the
work.
What
does
it
come
to
teach
us?
The
wicked
Esau
is
when
a
person
has
realized
that
the
bad
thing
in
the
world,
which
prevents
all
created
beings
from
achieving
the
delight
and
pleasure
for
which
the
world
was
created—which
is
the
meaning
of
bad—has
become
in
him
as
Esau,
from
the
word
Assiya
[doing].
His
evil
has
been
completed
with
clear
knowledge
that
it
is
the
will
to
receive
for
himself.
At
that
time
comes
the
order
of
“turn
away
from
evil,”
meaning
that
before
a
person
knows
that
the
will
to
receive
is
called
“bad,”
it
is
impossible
to
turn
away
from
it
and
not
listen
to
it.
Afterward
begins
the
matter
of
“and
do
good.”
“Do
good”
means
assuming
the
burden
of
the
kingdom
of
heaven.
However,
a
person
cannot
be
rewarded
with
the
quality
of
“a
woman
who
fears
God.”
Rather,
a
person
must
receive
this
from
above,
as
it
is
written,
“He
who
comes
to
purify
is
aided.”
The
Zohar
says
that
he
is
given
a
soul,
and
this
is
the
assistance
that
the
person
receives.
It
follows
that
this
soul
was
born
by
the
Creator
hearing
him
when
he
came
to
purify.
This
soul
is
called
a
“daughter,”
which
was
born
out
of
the
Creator
hearing
his
prayer
once
a
person
has
come
to
the
recognition
of
evil,
called
Esau.
This
is
the
meaning
of
what
is
written,
“And
Esau
went
and
took
Mahalat
the
daughter
of
Ishmael.”
“Went”
means
to
a
higher
degree,
once
he
has
come
to
the
recognition
of
evil,
called
Esau,
to
Yishma-El
[Ishmael,
meaning
“the
Lord
will
hear”].
That
is,
at
that
time
he
engaged
in
the
form
of
“do
good,”
praying
to
the
Creator
to
hear
his
prayer
and
give
him
a
soul,
as
it
is
said
in
The
Zohar.
This
is
the
meaning
of
“He
took
Mahalat,”
meaning
he
took
the
absolution
of
iniquities
by
which
he
was
rewarded
with
a
daughter
from
which
the
Creator
heard
his
prayer.
This
is
called
“the
daughter
of
Yishma-El.”
This
follows
a
certain
procession:
1)
Exertion
to
see
the
truth,
as
much
as
he
understands
that
the
will
to
receive
for
himself
is
harming
him.
At
that
time
he
can
determine
once
and
for
all
not
to
use
it,
and
this
is
called
Esau.
2)
Afterward,
he
is
rewarded
with
taking
a
woman
by
forgiving
the
iniquities.
At
that
time
it
is
possible
to
be
rewarded
with
it.
We
can
understand
the
meaning
of
a
woman,
which
is
the
soul
he
is
given
from
above,
according
to
what
is
explained
in
the
“Introduction
to
The
Study
of
the
Ten
Sefirot”
(Items
53-55):
“Then
the
Creator
helps
him
and
one
attains
open
Providence,
meaning
the
revelation
of
the
face.
Then,
he
is
rewarded
with
complete
repentance,
meaning
he
cleaves
to
the
Creator
once
more
with
his
heart,
soul,
and
might,
as
though
naturally
drawn
by
the
attainment
of
the
open
Providence.
Naturally,
one
who
is
imparted
this
open
Providence
is
certain
that
he
will
not
sin
again,
as
one
is
certain
that
he
will
not
cut
in
his
own
flesh
and
cause
himself
terrible
suffering.
In
addition,
one
is
certain
that
he
will
not
neglect
a
Mitzva
[commandment/good
deed]
without
performing
it
the
instant
it
comes
to
his
hand,
as
much
as
one
is
certain
that
he
will
not
neglect
any
worldly
pleasure
or
a
great
profit
that
comes
into
his
hand.”
This
repentance
is
regarded
as
his
iniquities
being
forgiven.
According
to
the
rule
that
all
the
Mitzvot
[commandments/good
deeds]
extend
from
branch
and
root—meaning
that
each
Mitzva
in
corporeality
has
its
root
in
spirituality—we
can
say
that
what
extends
from
this
is
that
in
corporeality,
too,
when
a
man
takes
a
woman,
his
iniquities
are
forgiven,
which
implies
to
spirituality.
Now
we
can
interpret
what
our
sages
said,
“How
to
dance
before
the
bride?”
and
did
not
say,
“How
to
dance
before
the
groom?”
Conversely,
concerning
the
wedding
meal,
they
said,
“One
who
enjoys
a
groom’s
meal
and
does
not
delight
him
(Berachot,
p
6)
transgresses
in
five
voices:
the
voice
of
merriment
and
the
voice
of
gladness,
the
voice
of
the
groom
and
the
voice
of
the
bride,
the
voice
of
those
who
say,
‘Thank!’”
They
did
not
say
that
we
must
delight
the
bride,
and
they
did
not
say
that
there
is
a
bride’s
meal,
but
only
a
groom’s
meal.
We
find
that
on
Jacob’s
wedding,
Laban
made
the
meal,
as
it
is
written,
“And
Laban
assembled
all
the
men
of
the
place
and
made
a
feast,”
meaning
that
the
meal
came
from
the
side
of
the
bride,
that
the
bride’s
father
made
the
meal
and
not
Jacob,
who
was
the
groom.
According
to
what
Baal
HaSulam
explained—that
“groom”
means
Torah,
and
“bride”
means
faith—we
should
interpret
what
we
asked.
Until
a
person
acquires
permanent
faith,
he
has
ascents
and
descents,
since
a
person
is
born
with
a
vessel
of
reception,
and
that
vessel
wants
to
engage
in
things
that
the
mind
says
are
worthwhile
to
engage
in,
meaning
they
will
benefit
the
will
to
receive
for
himself.
Otherwise,
he
cannot
work.
Also,
since
faith
is
above
reason,
meaning
that
the
reason
cannot
stand
them,
there
is
a
matter
of
ups
and
downs
here.
This
is
called
a
“dance,”
since
we
see
that
when
dancing,
we
lift
our
legs
and
bring
them
back
down
repeatedly.
This
implies
that
since
Raglaim
[legs]
comes
from
the
word
Meraglim
[spying],
meaning
that
when
one
should
take
upon
himself
the
burden
of
the
kingdom
of
heaven
and
serve
Him
only
Lishma
[for
Her
sake],
the
person’s
intellect
immediately
comes
and
makes
him
see
that
he
should
not
be
rash,
but
first
see
if
it
is
worthwhile
to
serve
the
Creator
not
in
order
to
receive
reward.
Therefore,
when
lifting
the
legs,
meaning
when
we
go
above
our
reason
and
intellect,
it
is
regarded
as
lifting
our
legs
above
the
earth.
However,
a
person
cannot
always
overcome
and
go
above
reason,
and
this
is
considered
placing
one’s
feet
on
the
ground
once
more.
This
is
the
meaning
of
what
he
says,
“How
to
dance
before
the
bride?”
(Ketubot
16b).
“Before
the
bride”
means
during
the
ascent,
called
Panim
[face/anterior].
What
should
he
say
about
the
bride?
What
is
the
merit
that
he
has
found
in
faith,
meaning
what
did
he
see
in
it
that
we
should
say
that
this
is
why
he
took
upon
himself
the
burden
of
faith?
Beit
Shammai
[House
of
Shammai]
say,
“A
bride,
the
way
she
is,”
meaning
that
according
to
how
he
feels
her
importance,
so
he
takes
upon
himself
the
faith.
That
is,
he
does
not
need
to
find
any
merit
in
her.
Even
if
he
feels
no
importance
about
her,
he
takes
upon
himself
what
we
were
told
to
believe,
and
this
is
all
of
our
merit—if
we
can
take
upon
ourselves
this
work,
which
we
believe
is
the
Creator’s
will,
and
we
need
not
look
for
any
merits,
but
simply
believe
and
take
upon
ourselves
by
coercion,
“as
an
ox
to
the
burden
and
as
a
donkey
to
the
load.”
Beit
Hillel
[House
of
Hillel]
say,
“A
bride,
fair
and
pious.”
We
should
interpret
that
this
means
that
a
person
should
say
about
what
he
sees,
“They
have
eyes
and
do
not
see.”
And
considering
what
he
hears,
he
should
say,
“They
have
ears
and
do
not
hear.”
That
is,
seeing
is
not
necessarily
with
the
eyes,
but
there
is
seeing
in
the
mind.
That
is,
the
mind
shows
him
depictions
that
contradict
faith,
and
he
often
hears
what
the
mind
makes
him
see—that
work
for
the
sake
of
the
Creator
is
not
for
him.
He
should
overcome
all
this
and
say,
“They
have
eyes
and
do
not
see.”
That
is,
what
the
mind
tells
him
and
makes
him
see
is
not
the
truth.
This
is
called
“They
have
eyes
and
do
not
see”
the
truth;
“they
have
ears
and
do
not
hear”
the
truth.
Therefore,
their
thoughts,
meaning
what
the
will
to
receive
for
himself
tells
him,
is
not
the
truth.
Rather,
he
should
tell
himself
that
indeed,
she
is
a
fair
and
pious
bride,
except
he
is
unfit
to
see
the
truth
right
now.
Yet,
the
truth
is
that
all
the
delight
and
pleasure
that
the
will
to
receive
can
receive
in
his
Kelim
[vessels]
is
but
a
slim
light
compared
to
the
light
that
dresses
in
the
vessels
of
bestowal.
This
is
called
“a
fair
bride.”
Yet,
a
person
cannot
always
overcome
his
mind
and
reason.
This
is
why
there
is
the
matter
of
dances
in
faith,
of
which
our
sages
said,
“How
to
dance
before
the
bride.”
That
is,
what
can
we
say
to
the
Panim
[face/anterior]
of
the
bride,
since
Panim
pertains
to
“a
man’s
wisdom
illuminates
his
face.”
Thus,
he
should
say
what
is
the
praise
that
there
is
in
the
bride,
called
“faith.”
This
is
the
difference
between
Beit
Shammai
and
Beit
Hillel,
whether
to
say,
“a
bride,
the
way
she
is”
or
“a
bride,
fair
and
pious.”
This
is
not
so
with
the
groom.
The
Creator
is
called
“Torah,”
and
Torah
is
considered
a
gift.
There,
there
is
no
dancing
because
when
a
person
receives
a
gift,
it
cannot
be
said
that
he
has
a
descent,
meaning
that
he
does
not
want
to
receive
gifts.
Only
where
there
is
labor
and
a
person
must
overcome
against
the
reason,
it
can
be
said
that
at
times
he
can
overcome
and
at
times
he
cannot.
Conversely,
when
receiving
gifts,
how
can
it
be
said
that
he
has
no
need
for
gifts?
This
is
why
they
did
not
say,
“How
to
dance
before
the
groom?”
but
“How
to
dance
before
the
bride?”
Conversely,
considering
a
meal,
it
is
written,
“One
who
enjoys
a
groom’s
meal,”
and
it
is
not
written,
“One
who
enjoys
a
bride’s
meal.”
The
reason
is
that
a
groom
is
regarded
as
the
Torah,
and
the
Torah
is
a
gift,
as
our
sages
said,
“From
Matanah
[gift]
to
Nahaliel”
(Iruvin
54),
where
it
writes,
“Why
is
it
written,
‘And
from
the
desert
to
Matanah,
and
from
Matanah
to
Nahaliel,
and
from
Nahaliel
to
Bamot,
and
from
Bamot
to
the
valley’?
He
said
to
him,
‘If
a
man
makes
himself
like
this
desert,
which
everyone
treads,
the
Torah
was
given
to
him
as
a
gift.
And
since
it
was
given
to
him
as
a
gift,
he
inherits
God,
as
was
said,
‘From
Matanah
to
Nahaliel
[rivers
of
God].’”
It
is
known
that
the
Creator
has
many
names,
according
to
what
He
reveals
to
the
lower
ones.
That
is,
it
depends
on
the
extent
to
which
He
bestows
upon
the
lower
ones.
That
is,
according
to
the
merit
of
the
lower
ones,
He
bestows
abundance
upon
them.
And
since
there
are
many
discernments
in
the
receivers,
as
it
is
written,
“As
their
faces
are
not
similar
to
one
another,
their
views
are
not
similar
to
one
another,”
and
as
we
learn
in
the
work,
that
a
person
himself
also
undergoes
changing
states,
therefore,
the
abundance
of
the
Creator
changes
into
many
discernments,
but
the
Creator
has
no
name,
since
“there
is
no
thought
or
perception
in
Him
whatsoever.”
Rather,
it
is
as
it
is
written,
“By
Your
actions
we
know
You.”
That
is,
according
to
the
abundance
He
bestows,
so
we
name
Him.
For
this
reason,
with
regard
to
the
Torah,
the
Creator
is
called
“groom.”
When
He
bestows
faith,
He
is
called
“bride.”
With
respect
to
the
purpose
of
creation,
which
is
His
will
to
do
good
to
His
creations,
for
the
whole
world
to
enjoy,
meaning
enjoy
in
the
way
that
is
called
“His
desire
to
do
good,”
meaning
that
He
sustains
the
Klipot
[shells/peels],
as
well,
or
they
would
not
be
able
to
exist
in
the
world.
This
is
as
The
Zohar
says,
that
they
have
but
a
slim
light.
But
in
Torah
and
Mitzvot,
the
light
is
clothed
there
by
way
of
“The
whole
Torah
is
the
names
of
the
Creator,”
whose
general
name
is
The
Good
Who
Does
Good.
According
to
the
above,
the
Creator
is
called
“groom”
because
He
is
the
Giver
and
bestows
upon
the
lower
ones.
The
creatures’
enjoyment
from
the
joy
He
gives
them,
and
as
was
said
that
what
the
whole
world
enjoys
comes
from
Him,
all
the
pleasures
are
called
“meal.”
It
follows
that
the
whole
world
is
enjoying
the
King’s
meal.
However,
there
is
a
difference
from
the
perspective
of
the
lower
ones.
There
are
lower
ones
who
believe
that
this
is
a
meal
that
comes
from
the
King.
And
there
are
secular
people,
who
do
not
believe
that
the
meal
comes
from
the
Creator,
who
is
called
“the
King.”
With
regard
to
his
being
the
Giver,
He
is
called
“a
groom.”
This
is
as
our
sages
said,
“One
who
enjoys
a
groom’s
meal
and
does
not
delight
him
transgresses
in
five
voices.”
That
is,
although
they
believe
that
the
meal
is
a
groom’s
meal
and
thank
him
for
their
pleasure,
there
is
still
a
higher
level,
meaning
that
by
enjoying,
they
should
delight
the
King.
According
to
the
above,
that
the
Creator
is
called
“groom,”
how
can
we
speak
of
delighting
the
Creator?
It
is
known
that
joy
comes
as
a
result
of
something.
When
a
person
obtains
something
new
that
he
yearned
for
and
received,
it
engenders
joy
in
a
person.
But
what
can
we
say
that
the
Creator
is
missing
that
if
He
receives
it
He
will
be
happy?
The
Zohar
says
(VaYera,
Item
399),
“There
was
no
joy
before
the
Creator
since
the
day
the
world
was
created
like
the
joy
He
is
destined
to
have
with
the
righteous
in
the
future.”
We
should
also
understand
this
verse.
How
can
it
be
said
that
the
Creator
receives
delight.
As
we
learn,
the
purpose
of
creation
is
to
do
good
to
His
creations.
It
follows
that
when
the
lower
ones
receive
the
delight
and
pleasure
that
He
has
prepared
for
them,
He
derives
pleasure
from
this,
as
it
is
known
from
the
allegory
about
the
king
who
has
a
tower
filled
with
abundance
but
no
guests.
Therefore,
we
attribute
the
meal
to
the
Creator
as
a
groom,
that
He
is
regarded
as
the
Torah,
a
gift,
Nahaliel
[rivers
of
God].
When
the
creatures
receive
the
delight
and
pleasure,
called
“meal,”
they
must
receive
everything
in
order
to
bestow
and
not
because
of
self-reception.
This
is
the
meaning
of
what
our
sages
said,
“One
who
enjoys
a
groom’s
meal
and
does
not
delight
him,”
but
receives
for
his
own
sake,
“transgresses
in
five
voices.”
The
five
voices
imply
the
completeness
of
the
degree
that
must
be
revealed
to
the
creatures.
That
is,
His
will
to
do
good
to
His
creations
is
revealed
in
five
discernments,
called
“five
parts
of
the
soul,”
which
are
Nefesh,
Ruach,
Neshama,
Haya,
and
Yechida.
This
is
why
our
sages
said,
“One
who
enjoys
a
groom’s
meal
and
does
not
delight
him,”
meaning
his
intention
in
enjoying
the
meal
is
not
to
please
the
Creator,
in
that
the
purpose
of
creation
is
achieved
in
its
complete
correction,
but
rather
his
own
benefit,
then
he
causes
five
voices,
meaning
the
NRNHY
that
should
be
revealed,
to
move
away
from
him,
since
there
was
a
Tzimtzum
[restriction]
on
the
vessels
of
reception
for
himself.
Thus,
the
light
does
not
extend
to
that
place,
and
that
place
requires
correction
in
order
to
bestow.
Yet,
he
does
not
regard
it,
and
therefore
causes
the
abundance
not
to
reach
the
lower
ones.
It
therefore
follows
that
our
sages
warn
us
that
we
must
prepare
ourselves
with
much
work
and
labor
to
1)
Believe
that
any
pleasure
we
receive
in
the
world
is
regarded
as
the
King’s
meal.
However,
we
must
believe
this.
And
because
of
it,
our
sages
have
set
up
a
specific
blessing
for
each
and
every
pleasure:
a
blessing
for
the
prayer,
a
blessing
for
the
Torah,
and
also
for
corporeal
pleasures.
2)
We
must
try
to
receive
any
pleasure
that
we
receive
from
the
King’s
meal
in
order
to
bestow,
and
not
for
our
own
sake.
Conversely,
when
the
Creator
bestows
upon
the
lower
ones
as
a
“bride,”
which
is
faith,
it
is
still
not
regarded
as
a
meal,
but
rather
there
are
ups
and
down
there.
This
is
why
there
are
dances
there.