One
Does
Not
Regard
Oneself
as
Wicked
Article
No.
31,
1985
Concerning
“One
does
not
regard
oneself
as
wicked,”
it
is
written
in
The
Zohar
(Balak,
item
193):
“King
David
regarded
himself
in
four
ways.
He
regarded
himself
with
the
poor,
regarded
himself
with
the
Hassidim
[pious/devout
followers].
Regarded
himself
with
the
Hassidim,
as
it
is
written,
‘Preserve
my
soul,
for
I
am
pious,’
for
one
must
not
regard
oneself
as
wicked.
And
should
you
say,
‘If
so
then
he
will
never
confess
his
sins,’
it
is
not
so.
Rather,
when
he
confesses
his
sins,
then
he
will
be
a
Hassid,
for
he
has
come
to
receive
repentance
and
takes
himself
out
of
the
evil
side,
in
whose
filth
he
was
thus
far.
But
now
he
has
clung
to
the
upper
right,
which
is
Hesed
that
is
stretched
out
to
welcome
him.
And
because
he
has
clung
to
Hesed,
he
is
called
Hassid
[pious/devout
follower].
Do
not
say
that
the
Creator
does
not
accept
him
until
he
details
all
his
sins
since
the
day
he
came
to
the
world,
or
even
those
that
were
hidden
from
him.
This
is
not
so.
Rather,
he
only
needs
to
detail
the
sins
that
he
remembers.
If
he
sets
his
mind
on
them
to
regret
during
the
confession,
all
the
other
sins
follow
them,”
thus
far
its
words.
We
should
understand
the
following:
1)
How
can
one
say
about
himself
that
he
is
a
Hassid?
This
is
already
a
degree
of
importance,
so
how
does
he
praise
himself
by
himself?
2)
He
says
that
one
should
not
regard
oneself
as
wicked.
On
the
other
hand,
he
says
that
one
should
detail
one’s
sins,
but
says
that
he
does
not
need
to
detail
all
his
sins
since
the
day
he
came
to
the
world,
but
should
detail
only
the
sins
that
he
remembers.
Thus,
when
he
details
the
sins
he
has
committed,
he
is
already
wicked.
So
why
does
he
say
that
one
must
not
regard
oneself
as
wicked?
Is
there
a
difference
between
saying
he
did
bad
deeds
and
not
saying
about
himself
that
he
is
wicked?
If
he
says
that
he
did
bad
deeds
then
he
is
saying
about
himself
that
he
is
wicked
anyhow.
It
is
as
we
find
in
the
words
of
our
sages
(Sanhedrin
9b):
“Rav
Yosef
said,
‘A
person
came
to
force
him;
he
and
another
conjoined
to
kill
him.
By
his
will,
he
is
wicked.
The
Torah
said,
‘Do
not
make
a
wicked
a
witness.’
Raba
said,
‘A
person
is
close
to
himself,
and
one
does
not
regard
oneself
as
wicked.’”
Thus,
this
means
that
if
he
says
that
he
has
sinned,
he
cannot
be
trusted
because
he
is
wicked.
But
here,
when
he
confesses
his
sins,
we
must
say
that
by
this
saying
alone
he
is
called
“wicked,”
since
you
are
saying,
“One
does
not
regard
oneself
as
wicked.”
Thus,
the
question
remains,
how
can
he
detail
his
sins
during
confession?
We
should
know
why
they
said,
that
“One
does
not
regard
oneself
as
wicked.”
It
is
so
because
“a
person
is
close
to
himself.”
By
this
we
should
say
that
since
“Love
covers
all
transgressions,”
we
cannot
see
any
faults
in
the
ones
we
love,
since
a
fault
is
something
bad,
and
one
cannot
harm
oneself,
for
he
is
partial
due
to
self-love.
For
this
reason,
“One
does
not
regard
oneself
as
wicked”
and
is
not
trustworthy
to
testify
anything
bad
about
himself,
like
a
relative,
who
is
disqualified.
We
should
know
that
when
one
comes
to
ask
of
the
Creator
to
repent,
and
asks
for
the
Creator’s
help
so
he
can
repent,
the
question
arises,
“If
he
wants
to
repent,
who
is
stopping
him?”
He
can
choose
to
repent,
so
why
does
he
need
to
ask
the
Creator
to
help
him
repent?
In
the
Eighteen
Prayer
we
pray,
“Bring
us
back,
our
Father,
to
Your
law,
and
bring
us
close,
our
King,
to
Your
work,
and
return
us
in
complete
repentance
before
You.”
This
means
that
without
His
help,
one
cannot
repent.
We
should
understand
why
this
is
so,
that
one
cannot
repent
by
himself.
In
previous
articles
we
explained
that
because
the
Creator
created
in
us
a
nature
of
desire
to
receive,
and
that
desire
initially
emerged
in
order
to
receive,
only
afterwards,
we
learn,
there
was
a
correction
not
to
receive
in
order
to
receive,
but
in
order
to
bestow.
This
is
called
the
“correction
of
the
Tzimtzum
[restriction].”
This
means
that
before
the
lower
one
is
fit
for
the
aim
to
bestow,
that
place
will
be
vacant
from
light.
What
extends
from
this
correction
down
to
the
creatures
is
that
before
one
emerges
from
self-love,
one
cannot
feel
the
light
of
the
Creator.
For
this
reason,
first
we
must
exit
self-love,
or
the
Tzimtzum
is
on
us.
However,
a
person
cannot
exit
the
nature
that
the
Creator
created
because
the
Creator
created
that
nature.
Therefore,
there
is
no
other
way
but
to
ask
of
the
Creator
to
give
him
a
second
nature,
which
is
the
desire
to
bestow.
Thus,
the
choice
we
attribute
to
man
is
only
in
the
prayer,
to
ask
the
Creator
to
help
him
and
give
him
that
second
nature.
For
this
reason,
when
one
wants
to
repent,
he
must
ask
the
Creator
to
help
him
exit
from
self-love
to
love
of
others.
This
is
why
we
ask
of
the
Creator
and
say
and
pray,
“Bring
us
back,
our
Father.”
But
when
does
one
truly
ask
the
Creator
to
bring
him
back
with
repentance?
This
can
be
only
when
he
feels
that
he
must
repent.
Before
he
comes
to
the
decision
that
he
is
wicked,
there
is
no
place
for
prayer
to
be
reformed.
After
all,
he
is
not
so
wicked
so
as
to
need
the
Creator’s
mercy.
The
meaning
of
the
prayers
that
should
be
granted
is
precisely
that
the
person
needs
mercy,
as
we
say
in
the
Eighteen
Prayer,
“For
You
hear
the
prayer
of
every
mouth
(so
it
is
implied,
but
when?)
of
Your
people,
Israel.”
Accordingly,
when
does
the
Creator
hear
the
prayer
of
every
mouth?
If
a
person
feels
that
he
needs
mercy.
This
pertains
specifically
to
when
he
feels
he
is
in
great
distress
and
no
one
can
help
him.
Then
it
can
be
said
that
he
comes
to
the
Creator
to
ask
for
mercy.
But
previously,
when
he
came
to
the
Creator
to
ask
for
luxuries,
meaning
when
the
state
he
was
in
was
not
so
bad,
that
there
were
people
whose
state
he
saw
as
worse
than
his,
then
his
prayer
to
the
Creator
was
not
because
he
needed
heaven’s
mercy,
but
because
he
wanted
to
be
in
a
better
state,
superior
to
others.
This
is
regarded
as
asking
the
Creator
to
give
him
a
life
of
luxuries,
meaning
that
he
wanted
to
be
happier
than
others.
Therefore,
when
one
wants
the
Creator
to
grant
his
prayer,
he
first
needs
to
see
that
he
needs
to
be
given
life
more
than
others,
meaning
that
he
sees
that
everyone
is
living
in
the
world,
but
he
has
no
life
because
he
feels
himself
as
wicked
and
sees
that
he
is
more
immersed
in
self-love
than
others.
At
that
time
he
sees
that
he
needs
heaven’s
mercy
not
because
he
wants
to
live
a
life
of
luxury,
but
because
he
has
no
life
of
Kedusha
[holiness].
It
follows
that
at
that
time
he
is
really
asking
for
mercy,
something
to
revive
his
soul.
He
cries
out
to
the
Creator:
“Since
‘You
give
bread
to
the
hungry;
the
Lord
sets
the
prisoners
free.’”
That
is,
he
sees
that
he
simply
needs
faith,
called
“bread,”
and
he
sees
that
he
is
sitting
in
jail,
called
“self-love,”
and
cannot
come
out
of
there,
for
only
the
Creator
can
help
him.
This
is
regarded
as
praying
a
real
prayer.
We
should
know
that
prayer
pertains
to
a
deficiency.
A
deficiency
does
not
mean
not
having.
Rather,
a
deficiency
is
a
need.
Therefore,
a
great
deficiency
means
he
has
a
great
need
for
the
thing
that
he
is
asking.
If
he
does
not
have
a
great
need
it
means
that
he
does
not
have
a
great
deficiency,
and
so
his
prayer
is
not
so
great,
because
he
is
not
as
needy
of
the
thing
he
asks.
This
is
why
the
request
is
also
not
as
big.
It
follows
from
all
the
above
that
one
cannot
see
a
bad
thing
in
himself.
Accordingly,
we
should
ask,
“If
a
person
knows
that
he
is
sick,
and
being
sick
is
certainly
bad,
he
goes
to
the
doctor
to
cure
his
illness.
If
the
doctor
tells
him
that
he
sees
nothing
wrong
with
his
body,
he
will
not
trust
him.
He
will
go
to
an
expert,
who
will
tell
him
that
he
has
found
something
wrong
with
his
body,
and
he
needs
to
undergo
surgery.
That
person
will
certainly
be
happy
that
he
has
found
what
was
bad
in
him,
and
he
pays
him
a
large
sum
for
having
found
his
illness
and
for
knowing
how
to
cure
his
body
so
he
can
live
and
enjoy
life.
We
see
that
if
we
find
the
bad,
it
is
a
good
thing,
as
with
the
illness.
At
that
time
it
cannot
be
said
that
a
person
does
not
see
bad
in
himself,
since
at
that
time
he
wants
to
correct
the
bad,
so
the
bad
is
regarded
as
a
good
thing.
It
follows
that
at
that
time
a
person
can
find
bad
in
himself.
Accordingly,
we
can
understand
the
words
of
The
Zohar
when
we
asked
how
on
the
one
hand
he
says
“He
does
not
regard
himself
as
wicked,”
and
then
says
that
he
must
detail
his
sins?
After
all,
when
he
details
the
sins
he
had
committed
he
sees
himself
as
wicked
by
saying
that
he
did
this
and
that
transgression.
We
can
answer
this
differently:
When
he
comes
to
ask
of
the
Creator,
He
brings
him
closer
because
he
is
immersed
in
evil,
meaning
in
self-love.
If
he
wants
his
prayer
to
be
granted,
he
knows
that
he
must
pray
to
the
Creator
from
the
bottom
of
the
heart,
meaning
that
he
needs
more
mercy
than
the
rest
of
the
people
because
he
feels
himself
as
worse
than
them.
At
that
time
he
must
see
for
himself
the
bad
that
he
has
more
than
the
rest
of
the
people.
Otherwise
it
is
regarded
as
telling
a
lie
that
he
is
worse
than
them,
and
it
is
written,
“The
Lord
is
near
to
all
who
call
upon
Him
in
truth.”
Therefore,
if
he
finds
evil
in
himself,
then
he
can
see
about
himself
that
he
has
a
great
need
that
the
Creator
will
help
him,
it
is
regarded
for
him
as
a
good
thing.
Therefore,
when
he
details
his
sins,
it
is
not
regarded
as
“regarding
oneself
as
wicked.”
On
the
contrary,
now
he
can
make
an
honest
prayer
for
the
Creator
to
bring
him
closer
to
Him.
It
follows
that
by
finding
bad
in
himself
he
becomes
very
needy
of
the
Creator,
and
a
need
is
called
“deficiency.”
Also,
the
prayer
he
prays
must
be
from
the
bottom
of
the
heart,
since
“from
the
bottom”
means
that
the
prayer
he
is
praying
on
his
deficiency
is
not
superficial.
Rather,
that
deficiency
touches
the
point
in
his
heart,
meaning
that
all
the
organs
feel
his
deficiency,
and
only
then
it
is
called
a
“prayer.”
By
this
we
will
understand
the
question
we
asked,
“How
he
says
about
himself
that
he
is
a
Hassid,
since
a
Hassid
is
already
a
degree,
for
not
everyone
is
called
Hassid,
so
how
could
he
say
about
himself
that
he
is
Hassid?
According
to
what
I
heard
from
Baal
HaSulam,
he
said,
“‘He
will
give
wisdom
to
the
wise.’
But
it
should
have
said,
‘He
will
give
wisdom
to
the
fools.’”
He
said
about
this:
“A
‘wise’
is
named
after
the
future.
That
is,
one
who
wishes
to
be
wise
is
already
regarded
as
wise.”
Therefore,
when
he
said
“I
am
pious
[Hassid],”
it
means
that
he
wants
to
be
pious,
which
is
called
“love
of
others.”
First
he
said
a
prayer
for
the
poor,
meaning
that
he
was
in
self-love,
and
“I
want
to
be
a
Hassid.”
This
is
why
the
holy
Zohar
ends
there:
“At
that
time
he
is
a
Hassid,
for
he
has
come
to
receive
repentance,
and
he
takes
himself
out
of
the
evil
side,
in
whose
filth
he
was
thus
far.
But
now
he
has
clung
to
the
upper
right
that
is
Hesed
that
is
stretched
out
to
welcome
him.
And
because
he
has
clung
to
Hesed,
he
is
called
Hassid
[pious/devout
follower].
That
is,
now
he
has
come
to
cling
to
Hesed,
so
he
is
called
Hassid,
after
the
future.
By
this
we
will
also
understand
what
the
holy
Zohar
says,
“Do
not
say
that
the
Creator
does
not
accept
him
until
he
details
all
his
sins
since
the
day
he
came
to
the
world.”
This
is
not
so.
“If
he
sets
his
mind
on
regretting
them
during
the
confession,
all
the
other
sins
follow
them.”
We
should
say
that
if
he
prays
for
the
public
and
for
the
root,
from
which
all
the
sins
come,
namely
the
will
to
receive,
naturally
all
the
sins
follow
them,
meaning
follow
self-love.