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A Sightly Flaw in You
210. A Sightly Flaw in You
I heard
It is written in the Talmud: “He who said to her, to his wife, ‘Until you see a sightly flaw in you.’ Rabbi Ishmael, son of Rabbi Yosi, said that the Creator says that she cannot adhere to him until you see a sightly flaw in you” (Nedarim 66b). The first interpretation of the Tosfot means that she is forbidden to enjoy until she can find a sightly thing.
This means that if one can say that he, too, has nice things with which he helped the Creator, so they can adhere to one another, so why has He not helped another? This must be since there are things in him, that he has good faith or good qualities, since he has a good heart, that he can pray.
This is the meaning of his commentary: “He said to them, ‘Perhaps like a becoming woman?’” This means that there is an external mind, better than all his contemporaries. Or “Perhaps her hair is pretty?” This means that he is as meticulous with himself as a hairsbreadth. Or “Perhaps her eyes are pretty?” This means that he has more grace of holiness than all of his contemporaries. Or “Perhaps his ears are handsome?” This means that he cannot hear any slander.